I'm beginning to suspect....

That the writers of CSI: Miami have reached the point where they're just making fun of David Caruso. Not content to just write a bad TV show, now they're actively courting the derision of the kinds of people who watch awful television ironically.

I was happy to find that someone had edited together this montage:



This is what I love about the Internet - until this went online, I had to spend twenty minutes explaining David Caruso's love of saying something dramatically and taking off/putting on his sunglasses before The Who kicks in. Now I can just send them a link. The best part of that montage is him kneeling in front of the statue of Jesus in Rio, praying for luck in his endeavor. That endeavor? Killing the mobster that shot Horatio's cancer-stricken wife on their wedding day. He ended up stabbing the guy to death. It was great.

Tonight's episode, which concerned paedophiles and the people who murder them, which ended well enough, with Horatio mercilessly beating up an unarmed paedophile who was in no way resisting arrest, opened with one of the most hilarious Horatio exchanges I've ever seen:

(The scene: A paedophile has been repeatedly run over by a car)

Frank: "That's cold."
Horatio: "Not cold, Frank. Cold-blooded." (Puts on sunglasses)

So apparently the writers want us to believe that Horatio Caine doesn't know what words mean. Or the writers don't know what words mean. Either way, it was wonderful.

Oh, and on the 'teaching valuable moral lessons' front, there was one character who announced that murdering a paedophile is not, in and of itself, an immoral act deserving of punishment. So on the whole, it was a far more morally educational episode than the one where the snake ate that woman.

I'm thinking of mounting a stage production where two actors perform every single Horatio/Character B exchange in the show's history.